*sends self email about banana bread*

*two seconds later* ooh, I got an email! I wonder who— oh. S’me.

not-burnie:

Apparently my little brother was watching porn on my older brother’s Netflix account so he wouldn’t get caught but plot twist my older brother was doing the same thing with my younger brother’s account and now they’re both grounded and I’m the only one allowed on Netflix

image

There’s porn on netflix?

(Source: kaijuno)

deepbreathsanddeath:

This is a real panda
China has this “panda diplomacy” and this one will be sent to Japan as an friendship envoy. For the safety reason he sits as a passenger with his feeder, not in a cage. Fastening the seat belt, wearing a diaper, eating bamboos

That is not a real fucking panda. Really people? They make the ENDANGERED ANIMAL fly COACH?

something I notice which is so painfully true

Tumblr: We love everyone and everything come join us in a big happy family!

Straight, white, mentally and physically stable, well-off male with a penis who is perfectly fine having said penis: Hi, I-

Tumblr: EXCEPT YOU GET THE FUCK OUT

sykohyko:

Now that Lucy is number one at the box office

THIS IS WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING. HOW DID A MOVIE LIKE THIS EVEN GET GREENLIT.

sykohyko:

Now that Lucy is number one at the box office

THIS IS WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING. HOW DID A MOVIE LIKE THIS EVEN GET GREENLIT.

/cough

If you are in the US and can’t get a copy of the new SP book, there is NO WAY that I have the epub. If you’d like to talk to me about not receiving the epub by email, please do NOT email me at cyberphuck (at) gmail.com, and DO NOT BY ANY MEANS put “skulduggery pleasant” into the subject line so I know who you are. 

I will NOT send you a copy of the epub because again, I DO NOT HAVE IT.

(and I’d like to point out that if you DO have the means to acquire this book legally— which I OBVIOUSLY ALREADY HAVE— you should do so, in order to support the author. Also, obviously if you don’t have a smartphone, kindle, nook, ereader, tablet or similar, even an imaginary epub will be useless to you.)

I AM NOT EXCITED AT ALL BECAUSE I HAVE NOT FOUND ANY KIND OF EPUB I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT ONE OF THOSE IS.

There’s a new Skulduggery Pleasant book out but I can’t read it because they won’t release it in the US

and Amazon UK won’t even let me buy a kindle version

and the gypsies don’t have it yet

and I don’t have enough money to have it shipped over

and even if I did it would take a MONTH to get here

/sobbing

kriegerthewolf:

ok so where are the maximum ride and artemis fowl fandoms?

YOU JUST PUSHED THE MOVIE RELEASE DATE BACK TO 2027

robertdafoto:

Amigo defensor

Hippos are not funny. Hippos are terrifying.

robertdafoto:

Amigo defensor

Hippos are not funny. Hippos are terrifying.

HAY WHAT R U WEARING U WANNA HANG OUT 2NITE LOL WINKYFACE GOT NE NUDES???

HAY WHAT R U WEARING U WANNA HANG OUT 2NITE LOL WINKYFACE GOT NE NUDES???

(Source: megacycles)

Soon I will be able to sit up long enough to work on my commissions again!

What with the “there is no possible way I’m pregnant” scare and then running around ragged baking pies and then going out to Citrus Heights and injuring myself in a skating rink and then today, where I did nothing but sleep and groan in pain because I decided to injure myself on a skating rink.

Protip: if it hurt the last time you skated, it’s going to hurt the NEXT time you skate. Promise.

Also did I tell you guys that when I reset my town, Meringue was one of my starters

She’s so nice. But I keep giving her random crap to put in her house so when I went there to visit there was all this cute shit and then like. an asteroid